Proud Native American

Ancestry DNA and E-Harmony.Com state unequivocally I am 80% Apache with traces of Sioux Harming me or simply hurting my feelings  is considered GENOCIDE (Lite) in most jurisdictions and is a HATE CRIME punishable by fines and imprisonment or both . BE ADVISED  the tribal lawyer is angry, ugly and  shrill. She  wears warpaint,  buffalo hides and looks like  Ruth Bader Ginsberg in the morning. After a bender. Your move. 

Native American Anti-Defamation League

Help ! I Have Asperger’s Syndrome

The Psychiatric Staff At Mt. Sinai Hospital NYC have determined the bearer of this card has Asperger’s Syndrome BIG TIME  and is incapable of controlling or understanding anything that comes out of his face.  BE ADVISED physically harming or verbally abusing this individual is a HATE CRIME  punishable by fines, imprisonment and mandatory participation in  no less than 10 (Ten) 5k Asperger Awareness Fun Runs.

Mt. Sinai Psychiatric -We Make Autism Fun 

Protected By The Police - SAVED A RESCUE DOG ! .

The bearer of this card was hit in the head rescuing Buddy The Police Dog  and has the  mental capacity of  Ralph in the Simpsons or Patrick Star In SpongeBob Square Pants The cops consider him a hero . Shoving ,  hitting or threatening   him is  Bullying and a Hate Crime and the police will  “question” you so thoroughly you could easily  end up like the guy who  delivers pizzas  in a wool cap in summer. Not Shitting !

Police Benevolent Assn. Animal Rescue League

HELP --I Am A Ree-Tard

Please call  Bide-A-Wee Mental Home (1- 800 – Nut-Haus ) and they will pick me up for free. If the bearer of this card is in  an agitated state try suggesting with pantomime gestures that he play with himself or his  own excrement until we arrive. Also , he likes the Mr. Rodgers “It’s A Beautiful Day In The Neighborhood,” song so kindly try singing a few choruses . Also ignore his pleas for “My Blanky” . The county deemed it  hazardous to  community health  and took it away.

Mt. Sinai Psychiatric -Bide -A-Wee Residential Wing 

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